summa summa

favorite quotes of fourth of july weekend so far:

"covah yo babays!"
-amy during the fireworks/billowing smoke

speaker at church: ... and we celebrated its 233rd birthday yesterday...
nate: whose birthday was yesterday?
me: nate, think about it.
nate: no seriously, whose birthday was it yesterday?
me: are you serious?
nate: who? who? oh...

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this summer has been very interesting so far. there really hasn't been any huge events or anything, but i've actually really enjoyed it so far-- when i was sure i would not. i'm pretty sure i said this in my last post, but my summer philosophy was that i needed a break. i have worked so unbelievably hard this last year and i just couldn't get myself to find a second job, or take summer school, or to plan out these huge adventures. part of me wanted to-- the driven personality-- but my body and soul were like no way. i haven't been able to sleep, relax, read, watch movies, go to church, hang out with friends, lay out in the sun, etc. for the last year. i could probably extend that to include the last 3 years, but the last year was definitely the most brutal. and i decided i just needed all of that. there was a lot i could have packed into my life this summer, i just chose not to. and that's a scary thing for me, because i hate to be alone. i always need something to do. and on top of it my friends are being plucked out of my life one by one and i knew there would be almost no one around this summer.

and somehow this summer has been awesome. if i really had a say in life, i probably would not have chosen to be here. but i've decided to let go of being a control freak for once and try to find the silver lining in everything.

silver lining #1: i've been able to spend a lot of time with my siblings. granted they have been drunk, immature, and infuriating, have bickered, stolen my clothes and i have ended up spending a lot of money on them. i'm saying this as my brother and sister are fighting in the other room and slamming doors. haha. but overall, its nice to get to know them. and they're at an age where we can actually go out and do things that i enjoy doing. and have adult conversations.

silver lining #2: even though a lot of my friends are gone, there are some pretty fun people who are still here. and even though the "group" is no longer a group and our "social gatherings" now usually consist of 2-4 people, i have had fun playing scrabble, drinking until we fall over, exploring minnesota, swimming and tanning, being taken out for dinner, watching fireworks. so far so good. and there's still a whole lot of summer left. 2/3 or 1/2... depending on how drunk we are. (joke.)

silver lining #3: jury duty. i'm looking forward to it. it probably won't be as cool as law and order, but you never know! and hopefully i'll get out of work and paid a lot of money.

silver lining #4: i actually for once in my life had a good birthday. the weather was probably the best it has been all summer--- very warm and sunny. we went to the beach, played frisbee, and tanned. then we went to eat pizza at little caesar's-- which i've never tried before. we played mini golf and then went back to my place and barbecued and watched "taken." drama was minimal. it was all better than i expected.

silver lining #5: we found an apartment in a short amount of time. and i really like it. i'm moving there in less than a month. so it will be nice to be in the cities again.

i could keep going and i know there were other things i was thinking of, but i think that's enough for one blog. while i would not have dreamed my summer would be this way, i am actually enjoying the little things. and its nice not to be overwhelmed and emotional, and i'm just going to continue to steer away from things that will make me that way. that's the plan.

much love,
Kara